Dear Biswick,
I am in Love with a married co-worker. What do I do next? - Ashleigh
Dear Ashleigh,
That is all wrong. Next you should move far away. When it comes to affairs of the heart, no one knows better than me, and I'm telling you nothing but trouble can come of this. When I was a young man, just out of the service, I once knew a woman who could bake the second most amazing Pecan Pie and always managed to get all the pecans to line up in a perfect starlike pattern. We'd eat the pie and listen to the radio on her front porch but that was all. Then her brother and I would go shooting out on the back end of the property her family owned, mostly at cans and bottles and old shoes and whatnot. I don't recommend shooting as a hobby but I do think you should find one.
Are cargo pants something that make men more sexy?
Thanks
- Donny
Dear Donny
What would I care about sexy men Donny? I just don't get what's going on with those fussy fancy pants with their drawstrings. I am a big advocate of the sansabelt slacks, they look like a million bucks, never need ironing and give you that smart man on the go look - I know because it says so right in the ads they put in the Weekly World News, where I order all my pants.
Sherman T.
I fall asleep in class a lot, how can I save my education?
-Jenny
Dear Jenny,
Youth today has no respect for the pursuit of education. Even back a few years young people took their studies far more seriously. Who can forget that delightfully motivated Laura Ingalls on Little House on the Prairie? She was quite the devotee and still found time to help Mom and Dad abut the house. Even more recently, the bookish Kimberly on Diff'rnt Strokes always made time for her studies setting a fine example for the precocious little Arnold. Now those are two teens I know really must have amounted to something in life.
Sincerely,
Sherman T. Biswick
biswick@smug.com
