Butt Head.

A syringe lays on a blue background, the plunger digitally replaced with the business end of a cigarette: a striking image, implying that smoking as an activity is just as lethal as other more potent recreational drugs. Conveniently in some locations around metro Philadelphia the billboards are commingled with yellow-on-black advertisements for a heroin detox center, further subtly reinforcing the message of stigma, the endless needle visuals leading one to wonder about the large market of addicts in the area. In other cities a similar scene plays out; Boston now has stylized grunge anti-tobacco billboards, with bold, recognizable icons (like a biohazard symbol), distressed fonts, and a color palette that speaks to angst and ennui. New York City checks in with the weakest creative of the bunch, a Nancy Regan meets Sally Strothers "do it for the children" smoking cessation campaign in soothing cream with photographs of politically correct children and families.

These messages of guilt have booted the Marlboro Man from the landscape; instead of quiet assurances of manly confidence, signage everywhere is now reminiscent of the dull constant throbbing annoyance of a toothache. The November, 1998 settlement between tobacco manufacturers and state attorneys-general is finally showing its teeth; Section III ("Permanent Relief") calls for outdoor and transit cigarette advertising to be removed, and the space turned over to "alternative advertising intended to discourage the use of Tobacco Products by Youth and their exposure to second-hand smoke." Despite the high profile given to the dangers of cigarette smoking recently - on top of the legacy of disclosure former Surgeon General C. Everett Koop started in the mid-Eighties -- people won't stop smoking. People who have never smoked before (mostly children, it's true) will start, no matter how many medical studies and advertisements are produced warning of danger.

All because there's nothing to take the place of cigarette smoking; no social glue that is as loaded with attitude and intangibly in-air-quotes-cool as that slim white tube. I'm not extolling the virtues of smoking but this is how it is; smoking is a social activity. It brings people together and, thanks to Hollywood, is irreversibly loaded with the James Dean slash Marlene Dietrich self-assured and impeccably coifed rebel attitude, diluted by the passage of time but still lurking in the background of public perception.

So, if smoking is really a problem worth solving -- after all there are so many battles to fight and so little time -- the solution is only partially realized by the tobacco settlement. Removing billboard and other public tobacco advertising was an excellent first step, but the blank spaces left behind shouldn't have been filled in with a tobacco-related message, never mind that it is all under the umbrella of public good. No, the same technique that the Simpsons used to great effect when advertising turned monstrous one Halloween is appropriate here: "Just don't look.." That is the most effective way to kill the cool factor of smoking: stop making such a big public issue out of it. A quiet progression of anti-smoking measures removed from the media spotlight will, over time, steadily lower the number of new smokers, thanks to the principals of supply and demand. When the hype and image are removed from smoking, there's not much to it, and no real incentive for young people to become smokers. The market for cigarettes will naturally expire in the manner of the Betamax and eight-track car stereo.

It isn't often the best solution is to effectively ignore the problem, but for smoking silence not shouting is the best way to kick the habit.

gregory@smug.com